Only anarchists are pretty...

Thank you for your application

From: The Obama-Biden Transition Project
To: [Me]
Date: Tue, 18 Nov 2008 4:48 pm

Dear Diana _________,

Thank you for completing your application to serve to in the Obama-Biden Administration. As you can imagine, we are receiving thousands of applications during the transition process. We will initially be focused on the most senior positions in the Administration. If you do not hear from us for several weeks or months, please do not think we have lost your information. If at any time you wish to update your application, please log in again and modify the information accordingly. Thank you again for your interest.

Sincerely,

The Obama-Biden Transition Project

Go on, you can give it a shot, too. Just look at all the jobs available. There seems to be something for almost everyone in there.

Thank you for your application

From: Obama-Biden Administration Jobs
To: [Me]
Date: Fri, 14 Nov 2008 5:52 pm

Hello Diana,

Thank you for your interest in joining the Obama-Biden Administration. Within a few days, you will receive an email with a link to the more complete on-line application. Please be patient, as we are trying to respond promptly to the large number of people who are interested in working in the Administration.

Thanks.

Worth a shot, right? (You can try, too.)

Don't go into a profession if you know that there are certain aspects of that profession you can't stomach. Period. Yes, I'm talking to you, doctors/pharmacists/medical professionals. Even though President I-Want-To-Force-My-Morality-On-Everyone is behind your "moral objections" to such things as abortion and contraception, you folks can't tell me you went through school and practice up until now thinking that you had the right to trump other people's choices with your own, just because you're in a position of power. Come on. Get real. You knew what you were getting into. You took oaths to help people. You don't get to refuse because you think your God or your morals are somehow better than the patient's.

And this argument that a patient can just go to another medical professional? Bullshit. We live in a world of insurance companies that make all the decisions about where a patient can get care, and in a world where the uninsured are told "Just go to the ER," in place of having real health care. There really aren't that many people who can just head off to another medical professional if you refuse to treat them. At the risk of overusing a phrase, your privilege is showing.

Look, once upon a time, I considered going to culinary school. I was fascinated with cooking, experimenting with new recipes, etc. But I knew I couldn't perform all aspects of the job. 'Cause I hate any and all seafood. Even the smell makes me feel rather ill. What kind of chef doesn't go near seafood? So I decided not to go into the culinary profession, because I knew there was an aspect of being a chef that I couldn't handle. You upright moral medical professionals had the same type of choice, and the same type of information before you got into this profession. So shut up about your personal morality and do your fucking job.

...but I've stopped looking today. Another day closer to the weekend, thankfully (and this will be a longer weekend than usual since our office is closed on Monday). Friday evening can never arrive soon enough to suit me these days. It's not that I hate my job, it's more that I just sort of slog through it every day. So another round of resumes should go out this week, then. I'll get to that tomorrow or Froday...

Tonight all I really have energy for is picking up a few groceries and watching Project Runway. I'm having pronounced insomnia issues again this week, for no real reason I can discern. So I'm all tired and zoned out, which means you get pedestrian entries like this one.

January 2 can be so depressing, can't it? Especially when it's only supposed to get up to 14 degrees F today. Holidays are over, work begins again, and all that stuff I said I'd do when January rolled round is now staring me in the face. Gah.

I don't make resolutions for the new year most of the time, but I will say that I hope this year to write a lot more, and to find my perfect profession.

And now, for posterity, have a look at these Panic pics from last Friday, taken back in the (now) bygone days when people could smoke in bars in Illinois. ( Panic pics, December '07 )

( And a couple of me from NYE )

-I'm fighting off a cold as best I can. This means extra vitamin C, and popping an Aleve Cold & Sinus each morning so I can get through the day. There is simply no way I can have a sick day this week, damn it.

-In case you didn't notice in my recap the other day, I got a call from an employer I applied with last week about an interview. That was the good news. The bad? Alas, the job is pretty far out of the city. I do so hate when jobs are listed as being in the City of Chicago and then end up way the hell away from downtown. But at least I captured the employer's interest. That always feels good.

Another Monday, another day of coming into work thinking I'm going to concentrate on A, but by mid-morning my work world's tilted and I'm working on Z. Ah, such is life. At least my schedule this week has now freed up a bit. Regarding my career search, I'm still taking steps, but slowing down a bit for this month and next month. Frankly, I've worked too hard this year to forego my end of year bonus. So I will start the hardcore search again in January, while I still send out the odd resume and network through the end of the year.

Weekend was laid back. Stayed in Friday, enjoying another nice fire. Watched The Wizard of Oz multiple times. Bitched about L, and drafted a letter last night with J that J is going to send to landlord, outlining our current grievances.

Saturday night I went with strtmyorange to see The Changes play with Athlete at The Empty Bottle. The Changes were grand, as always. Athlete? They were way too Coldplay for my taste. We left after 4 or 5 songs. Nice to see captainkiwi, though, as always.

I invented a new game while we were people watching at the gig. I can't really draw it out as a diagram as I should, and I need to add more to it, but here's the work in progress that is Gig Cliche Bingo: Put a White Belt free space in the middle of the board. Add squares for the following:
-Uber tall guy(s) who stand in front of short people.
-Too young looking preppy girls who keep wandering round the venue.
-The dude who biked to the gig and hits you with his bike helmet as he goes through the crowd.
-People who fake fight with their friends, thereby crashing into those around them.
-People who loudly proclaim that they don't know the name of the band playing.
-Trixies with over large purses.
-Band's parents/family.
-People talking with fake accents in the crowd.
-Girls who bump into you as they dance overenthusiastically.
-Guys who try to turn the gig into a mosh pit, no matter what type of music it is.
-People who are wasted before the gig even starts (often band members).

See? That's enough to call BINGO, but not enough squares as a whole. Add more gig cliches in the comments, if you like.

*Please feel free to take this title in the spirit in which it was intended, which is as a line from the theme song to Beach Blanket Bingo, because that was what was playing in my head as I was thinking about Gig Cliche Bingo. Or you can take it as the line from the ABBA song. Whatever takes your fancy.

Back in the office, blah. After spending roughly 4 days at home (went out on Saturday night, but that was pretty much it from Thursday night until this morning), you'd think I would be itching to leave the house this morning, but no, it was a chore to get out of bed.

On with the job search today, though I'm feeling hopeless about it at times. I apply to so many jobs, I try my best to network, I registered with recruiting firms (that did nothing at all), I've let most of the world know I'm looking, and I still feel most days like I'm sending resumes out into the ether, where they just disappear on the wind. I sometimes think I might have better luck if I just threw some resumes out the window. But I have to trudge on...I went to 2 law school events last week to network and plan to meet (again) with the Associate Dean I'm still in touch with, I'm applying to some more jobs today, and I'm contacting another recruiter that a friend has told me about (thanks strtmyorange).

Anyone else have trouble posting on LJ yesterday? I had to try 700 different times and ways to post one damned paragraph yesterday. I was not pleased, and wondered if LJ was censoring keywords or something due to this whole thing recently where they suspended a bunch of accounts. But I eventually got my paragraph to post, so I guess it was the usual LJ wonkery. Unless they're creating secret watch lists or something. But surely they will read yesterday's post and realize the importance of adding "concubining" to the American verbal lexicon.

Anyway, back at work, back in the city, and back to the job hunt. I'm holding out some high hopes for an absolute dream job for which I recently applied, so please cross your fingers for me. Not one to put all my eggs in one employment basket, however, I'm also meeting with a recruiter today. Can't hurt, might help, eh?

In the last few weeks lots of random things have occurred, and I've not had the time or inclination to post about them in detail. To recap, however, here are the highlights:

-I've gotten back in touch with one of my only friends from MSU, and that's been great.
-I've gotten checked for a small thing I wrote on here in December. Once again, I'm sorry if anything I write on here offends anyone, but what I write is a reflection of what I feel at a point in time, and I will not apologize for that, nor will I delete it. (Now you can have fun playing the what-did-she-write-in-December-to-piss-someone-off game.)
-I've been to see my family and also seen some close friends, and that always rejuvenates me.
-We've done away with SOF this year and decided to go with SOA - Summer of Alcohol. Seems more realistic.

Mondays suck in general, but Mondays when I come in to work early to try and get some time in front of Boss (mostly didn't happen), when the Staffer of Suck is back after being gone for 2 blissfully confrontation and incompetence free weeks, and when I have work to do on behalf of some of the most difficult and annoying clients we have, well, those Mondays suck even more. I felt exhausted before I even left the house this morning.

On to happier things, i.e., the weekend. Looptopia was really quite grand. Allowing for the fact that this was the first time the city's ever done this, it came off rather well. There were glitches, of course. Most of them stemming from the fact that so many people were out and doing the activities. The drag pageant was at capacity (but hey, I saw Top Design fella Erik and told him he did a great job), as was the Opera Idol singing contest, and most things at the Chicago Cultural Center. But I think if they just plan on massive crowds next year, the capacity issues would be solved. It was fun to see so many people wandering around the Loop enjoying music, art, you name it. Drinking beer in the hall with the armor at the Art Institute while listening to a great old-time jazz band was lovely. Seeing kids raving on the 7th floor at Macy's was cool. The whole thing had a sort of nice energy about it. I hope it becomes a regular thing.

( My grainy Looptopia photos )

Saturday Mum jane3tis and brother josh_vanity came in to town, and we dined at Iberico then boozed at Sidetrack, accompanied by constituent, zincandcopper and kz, among others. Another good time.

Yesterday we did the Mother's Day brunch thing at Deleece, as is our custom, and even though the french toast was sold out (damn it), we still had a good meal. Mum and J headed out soon after, and I ran some errands and tried to decompress.

The job search is going slowly. I got a bite on my resume last week, for a non-law job, which was a good feeling. Unfortunately, the job is in a not-that-easy-to-reach suburb/town and doesn't really pay enough for me to make my student loan payments. But it was nice to know they were willing to give me a shot. Now I just have to send out another slew of resumes.

I made this comment to p2wy, and it's so me I thought I'd post it here as well: Having finally gotten, in January and February, the winter I'd been whining was missing, I'm ready for Spring now. This is usually true of me by March 1 (which is Thursday). I've never quite forgiven the world for not being on my internal seasonal calendar, which states that Spring is March 1 - May 31, Summer is June 1 - August 31, Autumn is September 1 - November 30, and Winter is December 1 - February 28/29. The world will persist in keeping Winter through March and sometimes April, keeping Summer through late September/early October, and starting Winter in November. Stupid world.

It's clear, isn't it, what the problem is? Yes, not enough Autumn. Stupid world, indeed.

In other news, I'm making it a personal goal to send out resumes electronically at least a few times every week. I have this tendency to print off job listings, fold them up, put them in my bag, take them home, take them out of my bag, place them in a stack, then not look at them for weeks and weeks. Clearly I'm not going to be breaking any job offer records that way. So my goal is to be less careful and methodical about applying for jobs, and just upload my resume, dash off a cover letter, and let the career chips fall where they may. Here's hoping I get a call or two this way. Because something's got to give. I can't go on moaning about career change without doing something about it. And without going into detail, life at work has been quite trying lately. So here I go, trying to change my stars, so to speak, again.

The writing has been stalled lately. Some of it is the winter grays, some of it is time and energy (often the last thing I want to do upon arriving home from staring at a computer all day is turn on my lapstop to stare some more), some it is the desire to curl up and read more than I curl up and write (which, while necessary to the writing, I think, often precludes it in the evenings). But I've got to shake that, and get back to my fiction. Nothing's ever going to even have a chance at publication if it's never finished. I have 2 novels cooking (or rather, almost simmering) that I believe in. I have characters who are pissed that I've been neglecting them. I have notes of ideas. It's there, I just have to coax it out of the cave. Get over my laziness. Happily, this LJ, and my work at Boystowners and GenerationDebt, help keep the words and sentences percolating. For me, life can't be all bad as long as I'm still thinking about words and how they work best together. Which makes me a supreme dork, but I'm cool with that.

Speaking of reading, which I'm pretty sure was at least mentioned in the above paragraph (oh yes, there it is, I see it), I've had this obsession lately with a sort of retro melodrama genre. While I was sick I read The Best of Everything and Valley of the Dolls, both of which were immensely satisfying in a things-aren't-like-that-anymore-except- when-they-are sort of way. I just finished re-reading Rebecca (arguably one of the best atmospheric mysteries of all time), and am now reading Rebecca's Tale, which purports to tell us more about Du Maurier's enigmatic character. I also ended my long search for Peyton Place (thank you, Unabridged), which I must read before reading Return to Peyton Place, a book I've had for almost a year. And then, just as the weather gets warmer (I'm being optimistic), I expect I'll be ready to start A Summer Place. (It should surprise no one that I've been inspired to read all these books by their film versions from the forties through the sixties, all of which I will watch whenever they're on.) Anyway, it's a nice little kick I'm on, other than the fact that all of these books/films make me want to wear smart, retro fashions all the time, and my closet is stocked with modernity. Don't be surprised if you see me shopping for pearls and tweed, soon.

*-e.e. cummings

Yesterday it was still in the scary 60 degree realm weatherwise here in Chicago (scary because any time the weather is wrong for the season, my mind immediately thinks global warming and freaks out), today it is barely in the thirties. Welcome back, winter! We thought you might diss us this year! So now there is supposed to be this big winter storm coming through tonight/tomorrow, and there are like 10 inches of snow predicted. I had the news on this morning and the little news ticker across the bottom noted that there might be thundersnow. I am a lifelong midwesterner, and I have never seen or heard of that word before. It's kick ass, isn't it? Thundersnow. Sounds like a bad metal band. Or a professional wrestler. Or an X-man. What else could thundersnow mean? Comments welcome, go nuts.

At any rate, I'm looking forward to the snow. We've got firewood, I'm putting up my xmas tree this weekend, and I'm down with the holiday cheer, so bring it. I'm all good with snow throughout December, it's come January that I start cursing it.

In other randomness, Saturday will be my 4 year anniversary at this job. A long time, eh? I guess I've shown I can stick with something (I needed to show that, after my 3 month stint at my last job). So yes, I've been here 4 years, and I've been mildly unsatisfied for about 3 of those. So in January, the hardcore (because I am so hardcore) job hunt begins. I mean it this time.

Update:

Friday we got out early, so I did a little shopping, then met up with scottsteg, toehead and girlvii. We saw Capote and really dug it. Having read In Cold Blood (and I don't recommend seeing Capote until you've read In Cold Blood), it was fascinating to see the story behind the story. Philip Seymour Hoffman was amazing, as always. And the screenplay was written by Dan Futterman, of all people, which is a refreshing surprise. After that we split up to freshen up, then re-met up at Schubas to grab a bite and see The Changes, who put on a fab high-energy show as always. S and waxmuse joined us for part of the evening as well.

Saturday I slept late, then vegged for most of the day in preparation for the evening out. Went to darkroom with all the same folks from the night before, plus even more. It was fun: good friends, good music, good booze, a teensy bit of drama (T happened to be in the next booth and was rude to almost everyone, oh the shock), and someone in our group hooked up (alas, not me, and not even anyone I know that well). A good time was had by all.

Sunday I slept late (again), and vegged (again), until it was time to go to Sidetrack with constituent, zincandcopper and the rest of the boys for K's birthday. I had a few bloody marys and lots of water (despite the fact that I didn't get too tanked on NYE, I still didn't feel like boozing that much on Sunday), and then made it a relatively early night (got home by 1 or so).

Yesterday was spent reading, watching movies, and working on my '05 D List and my '05 Excellent poll. Oh yeah, and yesterday was spent feeling a bit of a cold coming on, which is coming on a bit stronger today. I guess I've been lucky to avoid one up till now.

Today it just feels sort of blah to be back in the office, of course. The job hunt is something I must return to this year. It's just a matter of sitting down and hammering out cover letters, which should be individualized for each job.

I'm feeling a little reflective this year, but I'm still not making any damned resolutions. I'll just hope for a better 2006 than 2005...2005 took some things out of me that I never thought I'd lose...and I don't want to go there again.

Right. Tuesday-that-feels-like-Monday. Court this morning was quick and boring, no clothing faux pas to report, alas. Maybe it's too cold for the usual suspects to wear their wildly inappropriate outfits. mostly I just saw bundled-up people hurrying off to their various destinations. Managed to run a couple of errands while I was out (post office, bank), and so my lunch hour is freed up to (gasp) eat lunch. Will wonders never cease.

Paged through the collection of jobs I've printed off in recent weeks (months) yesterday, and hope to send out cover letters/resumes today or tomorrow. Time to get moving and stop feeling this "is this all there is" feeling, a feeling that was quite prominent as my alarm went off at 7 a.m. this morning.

Countdown to josh_vanity's 21st: 22 days. He is planning on being here in Chicago from Feb. 9-12 or 13. We will be hitting up lots of places he's always wanted to go but never been able to: Panic at SmartBar, Exit, Neo. Plus I plan on taking him to a couple of other favorites: Tiny Lounge, Pepper Canister, etc. So mark your calendars.

A lil world/political round up:

Riverbend mentions this in connection with the upcoming Iraqi elections: "It feels like just about everyone who can is going to leave the country before the elections. They say the borders between Syria and Jordan might be closed a week before elections so people are rushing to get packed and get out. Many families are simply waiting for their school-age children to finish mid-year finals or college exams so they can leave." Not quite the optimistic picture your nightly news is painting, is it?

I know the whole Social Security thing is boring, (is anyone else like me, and always assumed there would be no more Social Security by the time I was old enough to collect it, except for that brief moment of surplus at the end of the Clinton presidency?) but check out some poll numbers about it: Americans favor Democrats over Bush on Social Security by a 50:37% margin and 18-30 year olds, the age group most certain Social Security will detonate by the time they get there, favor the Democrats 59:32%.

A good comment on MLK Jr. Day, with links to his works.

One Episcopalian church's idea of how it will treat hetero and homo marriage equally while the national leadership of the church doesn't: don't perform any marriages at all.

And for those of us who are interested in the madness (and who can't make it to the Counter-Inaugural) here's a list of who's performing at the inaugural balls. In addition to the various country acts there are some "pop" or "rock" acts playing, as if you needed more proof that Hillary Duff, Ruben Studdard, and 3 Doors Down sucked ass.